I’ve finally come to the realisation that I don’t actually have a romantic longing for any of the boys I know.

This is an epiphany for me, because I fall into an infinite spiral of loneliness that tricks me into believing I want to be in a relationship with every single boy who shows me they care about me. 
That is fucking stupid.
I care for them in ridiculous amounts, but only as people who are going to support me, and make bad jokes with me, and tell me I’m pretty when I feel horrendous. I need them, but if they left me, I wouldn’t spend my days eating chocolate and watching romantic comedies.